Saturday, October 23, 2004
More...
Now, I've decided to get out there and meet new people and... it's working. I'm having a good time, meeting fabulous people, developing my social self, and hopefully adding a little of something to their life experience too. I should mention that I do have a boundary line for making and breaking these new relationships.
I believe it's important, while developing my own culture, to align myself with people that make me want to be a better person. I figure that this may be a simple value to place on friendship, maybe even assumed for many of you, but this wasn't something I had previously understood for myself. If I align myself with someone who sincerely supports me - my ability, contribution, and personality -I will be socially complete with that person (at least in one or more areas of my life). It's almost as though I have invested and cashed in some stock (maybe it's a mutual fund).
In the dictionary, friendship is defined as a "person with whom one enjoys mutual affection and regard". Further on, it is defined as "a patron or supporter of a cause". Sure, the latter definition is likely directed at a more legal or business relationship, though I would like to apply it to my cultural experiment. I don't believe my social development demands a large number of deep, intense friendships. Though, I do believe that every level of friendship that I engage in, and ultimately commit to, should bear this one boundary as a foundation to our 'future together': let's encourage one another to be the best person we can possibly be.
Authenticity + accountability
Idealism + realism
Imagination + experience
Now, I've decided to get out there and meet new people and... it's working. I'm having a good time, meeting fabulous people, developing my social self, and hopefully adding a little of something to their life experience too. I should mention that I do have a boundary line for making and breaking these new relationships.
I believe it's important, while developing my own culture, to align myself with people that make me want to be a better person. I figure that this may be a simple value to place on friendship, maybe even assumed for many of you, but this wasn't something I had previously understood for myself. If I align myself with someone who sincerely supports me - my ability, contribution, and personality -I will be socially complete with that person (at least in one or more areas of my life). It's almost as though I have invested and cashed in some stock (maybe it's a mutual fund).
In the dictionary, friendship is defined as a "person with whom one enjoys mutual affection and regard". Further on, it is defined as "a patron or supporter of a cause". Sure, the latter definition is likely directed at a more legal or business relationship, though I would like to apply it to my cultural experiment. I don't believe my social development demands a large number of deep, intense friendships. Though, I do believe that every level of friendship that I engage in, and ultimately commit to, should bear this one boundary as a foundation to our 'future together': let's encourage one another to be the best person we can possibly be.
Authenticity + accountability
Idealism + realism
Imagination + experience
Comments:
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I like the values you have ascribed to yourself - particularly authenticity & imagination...but I am curious as to how you see idealism and realism adding up?
Garth,
It is interesting that you busted me on the 'idealism + realism' thought - it was the one I was most wary of posting. Would it be more appropriate to say that idealism + honesty are indicative of healthy social relationships? I want to refrain from saying both authentic and honesty, because they are similar with a slightly minute twist.
- E
It is interesting that you busted me on the 'idealism + realism' thought - it was the one I was most wary of posting. Would it be more appropriate to say that idealism + honesty are indicative of healthy social relationships? I want to refrain from saying both authentic and honesty, because they are similar with a slightly minute twist.
- E
Sorry, I couldn't resist - that's what happens when you get a philosopher prof posting on your blog...and yes - clearly I am an idealist - so I'm certain you had the best of intentions with putting both idealism + realism as some of the characteristics you think appropriate in healthy relationships. Obviously idealists need realists around them to bring them back down to earth. And realists need idealists to shake their worlds up a little...so perhaps you could say that a balance between idealism and realism are a part of healthy relationships?
G
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